Tag: couple time

Rediscovering Self and Partner Care In the Exceptional Parent Equation

apartment, architecture, bed

So today was a bit of a rediscovery for Michael’s Dad and I. We had a long period of time when we were together late this afternoon at a spa and then out for dinner and talking at home after dinner. Uninterrupted talk that does not center on Michael is very difficult indeed for us, as is finding activities to do as a couple when Michael is absent from home for a long period. This does not happen often in our house, as I imagine it does not happen often in other houses either, especially when there is more than one child. It is complicated for parents to get away and rediscover who they were prior to becoming parents. Michael’s Dad and I are in the process of doing that now. There are ups and downs in the process, and we are excited to embrace the ups and prepared to handle the downs. In the end,  the fact that we are having the couple “self-care” discussion is important. Seld-care  and couple-care are both integral to how you will handle your relationship with your child and yourself as well as with others.

Michael’s Dad and my partner is not a big spa guy, but for me he went and made the best of it. I love him more than words can say for that. We talked over dinner and wine 🙂 what activities he may be more interested in trying out for our next couple day/evening out. I hope it will be before Michael’s next school camp outing in a year! We will do our best to prioritize it, with securing a sitter so we could perhaps spend a night away somewhere. I know Michael is having fun at his school’s sleep away camp, even before hearing from his teacher and getting great pictures to boot. This makes me realize that Dad and I need to have our own fun too when we can. It makes us better individuals and parents when we are relaxed and feeling well put together. Michael deserves to be happy and so do we as his parents. That is what will make us all handle stress and everything in between so much better.

Exceptional Parents, do you truly make time for self-care and couple care within your family? Remember, you and  your partner deserve time alone and together in order to parent at your strongest. Don’t ever be afraid to make plans (even small ones), to prioritize  your relationship. If you as adults are strong, it will help build the whole family up. Until next time.

 

 

Intimate Marital Connections And Risks

 

I am proud of the small steps Michael’s Dad and I are making in taking care of ourselves as individuals, as well as spending time with Michael. Making time for us as a couple is more difficult, but at at least we are aware of what we need to change. What works best is planning in advance for a “date night” whether that is going out somewhere and arranging a sitter, or a quiet evening in. This month has been hectic for both of us with work and with Michael’s schedule so we have not had a lot of energy by night time. Either he or will crash early, but we are finding ways to communicate, even if it’s just texting each other during the day. I have joked with my friends that my marriage is lived on “text”, but on the hectic busy days it is better than nothing, as they say.

With Michael I am seeing a smooth transition where Dad takes him to activities and they do their evening bonding during the week. I’ll step in when I have to if Michael’s Dad is having a hard day and he will do the same thing. I can see that though there is work to do still, as a couple we are getting stronger. I also see how both of us have learned to ask for what we need to be strong. For me, attending my writer’s meetings in the evenings is important, and for my husband his evening workouts and personal time is important for him. We have both learned to ask for this time around taking care of Michael, and it is working well for us. I am happy that we are both doing this. Michael has helped us see what we need to do to be strong, happy, and healthy people.

Exceptional Parents, how have your Exceptional Children helped you to grow as an individual and in your relationships? To me, Michael has helped to open my eyes to how I need to prioritize time, objectives, and things that are important to me. him being at the top of the list. Remember, when you are strong in yourself, in your  relationships, you are strong for your child to guide them to success in their life. Until next time.