So this post is about balance, balance for the child and the parent. Physical, psychological and spiritual balance, because only when we as adults and our children have that balance, do we come close to experiencing some kind of peace. It is not always easy or obvious to us parents what our exceptional child needs. And the thing is, most exceptional children have more than one official so-called diagnosis, whether we want to admit it or not. They have may Autism and ADHD, or Autism and learning disabilities or anxieties or all of the above. The thing is, our kids need strategies to manage their hyperactivity as we do, whether we their parents are neuro typcial or not. The thing is, it does not really matter. All of us get unhinged at times. It’s coming back to our center that matters, and only if we could do that can we feel whole. That is why it is so important that we show our exceptional child how to do that.
It has been a tricky journey for us and Michael in this regard. Michael was never just a straight autism brain as many had told us. We always saw the extra anxiety, phobias and hyperactivity that made up the rest of the wonderful person he is. I saw this because it is all good. I would not have Michael any other way, but I do want him learning how to manage his anxiety and other issues to live life to the fullest as he deserves to. He is a bright, happy, engaging little boy who has lots to offer to the world. As long as he is able to learn to self-regulate himself in a fast paced stressful world, he will do ok. Let’s admit. This is hard for even us so called neuro typical adults. Imagine kids faced with additional challenges. That makes it all the harder. Still, finding what works for your child, reminding them of their coping mechanisms and your pride and belief in them can go a long way.
Things that have worked for Michael self-regulating have included deep breathing, sensory massages, physical activity and sensory activities like play doh, thera putty, trampoline jumping and swinging. I have always helped Michael see how finding ways to self-regulate can help him, us and everyone around him. I have also reminded him how his “different brain” can do so many wonderful things, so he can definitively figure out how to handle hyperactivity too. He just has to ask for help, take time to think and pause for what he needs, and to know that all people, both exceptional and neurotypical have struggled with these questions.
As for me as an exceptional parent and other exceptional parents, we also need to know what strategies work to calm us. Are we runners, meditators or bathers? Do we like going out with friends to unwind or prefer an evening at home alone? Do we like reading, movement or tv? Finding our own balance as parents can also help us parent our child more effectively.
Exceptional Parents, are you feeling at a loss as to how to help your hyperactive exceptional child? Take a deep breath. You are not alone. First, offer suggestions to your child that you know can work. Second, be open to trying new things. Third, let your child lead you to what they think they can do to calm down. You may be as surprised by their insight as you are by your own. The thing is, both of you know what to expect by now, and even if not, know what can possibly work and be brave enough to share it. Now it’s your time to go for it. Your child will be happy you trusted in them and they will learn to trust themselves too. Until next time.
I am a writer, speaker and parent coach. I blog about how my exceptional son with Autism, ADHD, OCD and Type 1 Diabetes is raising me to a better human being and exceptional mom. My mission is to empower other exceptional parents to trust in their parenting instinct while letting their exceptional child open their eyes to all that is possible! For more information on my coaching services and to download a copy of my FREE EBOOK “5 WAYS TO HANDLE EXCEPTIONAL FAMILY ANXIETY” see my website, http://www.creatingexceptionalparenting.com