So for many parents the beginning of another school year has begun or will be beginning. What should parents take into this school year and teach their child to take in? Well, from personal experience, I have to say that the first thing both parent and child need is control. Control of their own reactions, their child’s reaction and how to come out calm and composed at the end. This is not always an easy feat, as sometimes parent and child can both be frazzled by the prospect of a new school year, but it is utterly necessary. Necessary that both the parent and child accept that there will be ups and downs that they will have to deal with. Accept that they need to find the necessary tools to be on top of stress at all times, and accept that when they are not, they need to ask for help, and finally accept that sometimes it is by giving up control that one regains it.
I have learned so much from Michael this summer about control, particularly how to help him control his aggression and anxiety. Other summers it has been more about hyperactivity. This summer has been the summer to master aggression control. Hyperactivity only started to come into the picture in a major way during the last two weeks or so. What Michael has showed me, is that how I handle my anger and impulses can have a pretty direct impact on showing him to handle his. This is not to say that I am responsible for when he fails to handle his aggression or anxiety. This has taken me time as a parent to realize. If he truly is thrown for a loop, I step in and give strategies for the next time. However, I now realize I am not responsible for saving my child. He is in the end. This does not mean I don’t try with therapy measures, professionals, and medication, but that after doing all of this, I make sure that Michael has the tools to realize on his own what he needs to do.
In the last week alone, I have seen much improvement in Michael’s ability to handle stress, anxiety and coping. I have seen, once again, a new medication, hard work, and perseverance help Michael push through his fears. I have been immensely impressed by his hard work.
Exceptional Parents, how do you teach your Exceptional Child about self-control? I’m sure it is by first learning to control your most difficult emotions-anxiety, anger and fear. Once you have found ways to handle these emotions, you can then show your child what they need to do to cope with their out of control thoughts and words. Remember, there will be moments that you fail. So will your child. Instead of beating yourself up, learn from these moments and become stronger using techniques that will help you defeat anger, anxiety and aggression. Until next time .
I am a writer, speaker and parent coach. I blog about how my exceptional son with Autism, ADHD, OCD and Type 1 Diabetes is raising me to a better human being and exceptional mom. My mission is to empower other exceptional parents to trust in their parenting instinct while letting their exceptional child open their eyes to all that is possible! For more information on my coaching services and to download a copy of my FREE EBOOK “5 WAYS TO HANDLE EXCEPTIONAL FAMILY ANXIETY” see my website, http://www.creatingexceptionalparenting.com.