Mother’s Day had never been typical in our house. There have been some years when there was flurry of family visiting which overwhelmed Michael and exhausted me when he was little. There have been others I spent crying in my room where even going out somewhere just the three of us was a trial. Then, there were the glorious ones. I’ll never forget the one when Michael was four years old and rode a tricycle for the first time all by himself down the street. Tears were pouring down my cheek, and though I enjoyed the flowers from Dad, the craft Michael had made me at preschool as well as the dinner we ordered in, that was the highlight of my Mother’s Day that year.
Over the course of the last few years though, I have truly learned how to balance what I enjoy most about this day with what Michael is capable of doing on that day. As he has gotten older, Mother’s Day has become more of what he will make for me in school and perhaps do for me at home. Before when he was younger, he was famous for saying, “Yeah, it’s Mother’s Day. I get to have Indian food,” as yes, that has become our staple food to order in on Mother’s and Father’s Day. Now this year, he said that included in the gift he made at school, he wanted to bake me cookies. He talked about not having enough money saved up to buy me bath supplies from my favorite bath store. He said next year he would make sure he had it. I was touched beyond belief that he was thinking of getting me things I liked, and that Mother’s Day was about me as it is about celebrating what all Moms do for our children. It is out of love, of course, and we would not trade it for anything in the world, but still we appreciate being remembered. He is maturing and coming into his own. I, for my part, told him that the gifts did not matter. Spending time with him is what did as well as the fact that he is my gift. It felt so special to be able to share this with him, as my mother had shared it with me years and years ago.
This made me realize how Moms need not have any particular expectations of what will happen on Mother’s Day. Make sure your child knows that you celebrate having them in your life and mark the truly amazing journey being an Exceptional Mom has been for you. It’s far from an easy journey, which is why I have also learned in the last few years to make sure I spend some time on Mother’s Day alone too unwinding. I usually do this near the end of the day. I take a cup of coffee or glass of wine (or Sangria) 🙂 outside if the weather is nice, or curl up in one of my favorite rooms in the house (my solarium or home office) with a book or a writing journal, and soak up some quality r & r Mommy time. It’s important to recharge those Mama batteries for all the days to come when my child will need me to be strong and understanding. As any Mom will tell you, it is your job to be ready to help your child no matter what.
Exceptional Parents, what has been your most positive Mother’s Day memory? What has been your hardest Mother’s Day? No matter what, remember, being a mother is hard work. It is soul work, and requires a woman to grow, nourish and feed the parts of herself that will contribute to helping her raise another human being to the best of her abilities. Your child knows you love them, and will feel your joy on Mother’s Day if you follow their lead, and what they understand about the celebration. In the end, it’s all about the journey of growth you are both on together as you raise each other. Until next time.
I am a writer, speaker and parent coach. I blog about how my exceptional son with autism and type 1 diabetes is raising me to a better human being and exceptional mom. My mission is to empower other exceptional parents to trust in their parenting instinct while letting their exceptional child open their eyes to all that is possible! For more information on my coaching services and to download a copy of my FREE EBOOK “5 WAYS TO HANDLE EXCEPTIONAL FAMILY ANXIETY” see my website, http://www.creatingexceptionalparenting.com.