Michael has been giving me so many positive surprises lately. I am incredibly grateful, as it makes the challenging moments easier to bear for both of us. He is openly commenting on how he wants to control his aggression and anxiety in a better way, and most of the time is succeeding. He is also more affectionate, calm and appreciative when I am busy. He will understand when I say, Michael I need a minute. And today at bedtime, for the first time in awhile, I got “Mommy, you are the best mother in the world!” This made my week, never mind my night! And not because of the words only. But because it means my little guy and I are FINALLY connecting after months of behavior struggle. This is bliss and music to my ears!
I always knew that much of Michael’s aggression and anxiety is due to how he misinterprets things that happen, are said, and information is not taken in the same way for him. As I have often said, Michael has a different brain, like all kids and adults who are exceptional. They don’t want to be treated as special. They don’t want pity. They want understanding and compassion and help to make their way in a world that is often totally foreign to the way the see things.
As I have always encouraged Michael’s unique view of the world and learned that when I didn’t, I was crushing his spirit. A compliment from him and kids like him goes such a long way. I am so happy to be able to reach my child who in so many ways is me, yet not me. He struggled from utero on to hold on in a world that was hostile to him at times. He had a hard entry into this world, but he wanted to be here with us and came. He needed to be here. Whether you believe in a Higher Power or not, special children come into the world the same way all children come into the world, to fulfill a mission, a purpose, to bring hope, to bring their gifts to the world at large. It is our job as parents, and those who work as teachers, therapists and in the health care profession, to make sure our kids get to deliver whatever message they need to bring.
Michael brings light, joy, and hope to so many people who know and love him. He brings this to strangers who beam at him in stores. He brings this to his father and I, his extended family and friends. All I need to remember is to model for Michael the calm happy life. This does not mean the perfect life, but rather the life that is pondered upon, lived in helping others and for others, and in bringing or lighting someone else’s light to live out their full potential.
I have several favorite movies, and the one common theme in them all is that of love, transcendence, and hope that we can change the world by our belief that love heals all, even the most horrendous circumstances and trials. “Life is Beautiful” is one of my most favorite movies for that reason, as that message resonates through right up until the end.
Exceptional Parents, how do you show your Exceptional Child how to heal from anxiety and stress? Yes, showing is the best way to teach! Talking is only part of the plan. By living your message, this is the best way your child will learn from their trials and become stronger. Until next time.
I am a writer, speaker and parent coach. I blog about how my exceptional son with autism and type 1 diabetes is raising me to a better human being and exceptional mom. My mission is to empower other exceptional parents to trust in their parenting instinct while letting their exceptional child open their eyes to all that is possible! For more information on my coaching services and to download a copy of my FREE EBOOK “5 WAYS TO HANDLE EXCEPTIONAL FAMILY ANXIETY” see my website, http://www.creatingexceptionalparenting.com