So this morning it did not go so well at my house. By not going so well I mean, me wanting to tear my hair out piece by piece to get my son to a) actually get out of bed during one of the four times we called him b) to actually move quickly when he is over thirty minutes late and making Dad late too, and c) stop telling him I don’t care how tired he is, because so am I. The problem with all of the above? They feel good for a nanosecond, then you are stressed out as the parent, the fighting stalls things, and no one wins. Now normally things go pretty well in the mornings. We have a great new system that really works and Michael is usually so cooperative. The problem is last night I went. Michael was worried. He fell asleep late and was already tired this week. I kind of saw it coming but hoped he could hold off for one more day. Tomorrow is a PED DAY for him, thank God. There were good reason for what happened, but it is still not a good thing for either parent or child to go through. So what’s a parent to do to handle things more calmly in these circumstances? Here’s what NOT To Do:
- Do Not Yell Your Head Off: This only makes our kids more stressed. Sigh. This is hard for ALL kids, but it sets offf behaviors in our exceptional ones. Mine included. Count down to ten, do some positive visualization. Whatever. Before not after the fight.
- Have A Logical Consequence Ready-No Long Term Threats: Threatening the child with no AV or treat after school for the morning stress does no good. It just frustrates them and you more and makes life hard for everyone.
- Telling the Child You Don’t Care That They Are Tired: Guilty as charged. I was so angry, I yelled this out in a moment of anger, but then I regretted it. I later told Michael we are all tired, but need to make better choices.
- Visualizing This As Happening Every Day And Getting Discouraged: Don’t do this. Look at your morning routine, tweak it, and see what can go better and what can be changed.
- Forgive Yourself: Some mornings will be rough. Learn from them. You are only human as is your child. Always tell your child that tomorrow is another day to start over and begin again.
Exceptional Parents, what has and has not worked for you in your morning routine? Remember, our kids have a hard time with sequencing. That is why a good morning routine is essential. Even with that though, sometimes things will fail. Don’t worry. Look at what can be learned, laugh at yourself, and be flexible in making some change for the future. Until next time.