So the first day of camp yesterday was a great success. I knew it would be, both due to the camp’s reputation, and Michael’s maturity and love of organized activities where he can interact with peers. Today they are going swimming to the local pool and he is very excited. There is a calmness about him this year going to camp, an assurance that I can do this. I am noticing this more in all facets of his life, even in his interactions with his father and I. He is making connections, talking, negotiating, oh yes, always negotiating, and asking for what he needs and wants very clearly. He is also better able to go with the flow of changes than he ever was before, though there are some challenges still. He will tell me he is swearing at me in his head when he doesn’t like something I say or do. It is funny in one way, yet still concerns me when I see how invested he is in having things unfold a certain way. The good thing is though, I can gently redirect him to his strategies to calm down, and slowly he is starting to do them. He sometimes even does them on his own right away.
For all the times he will tell me that he is bored at home and that he wants to be alone, he will also approach me to play with him, to be in the same room as him, and will ask where I am in the house. He is self-sufficient, insists on making his own breakfast and making his own lunch (most nights) :), but wants to know I am still there in the background to help him if he needs it, to catch him if he falls. I get that. I feel that way too as an adult. I want to know my loved ones, my close friends are there for me too in the tough challenging times in life, in the transitions. After all, what is life if we don’t have those connections, if we are not making a difference, or make a difference, in someone’s life?
Exceptional Parents, how are your Exceptional Children’s connections with you and others? How do they differentiate themselves from you and other people? This can be a tough one for our kids who often feel that they are you are the same. They need to be taught to respect boundaries, theirs and yours. The most important thing is that they are out there making connections to others in their own way though, however they can. Don’t push. Let them go at their own pace and, as with many other things, they will surprise you I’m sure. Until next time.