So today I made two mistakes. One was a personal one as a Mom, the other one was a business one. They both caused me great stress, but were wonderful learning experiences. I learned about how far I’ve come in forgiving myself for errors of judgment, and I learned how easy it is to get caught up in the hectic day to day pace of life that we forget to pace ourselves, as parents and as individuals. I also learned how having a system to keep track of things, again both personal and for business, can help.
Michael had a hard time today handling some morning misbehavior and forgiving himself for it. His anxiety and the mounting pressure to do things right and quickly, ended up making his nervous and through off the beginning of his day and mine. We worked it out after a yelling match, and I drove him into school. The incident involved not finishing his homework on time. He had asked me if we could do his work in the morning as he was tired the night before. I was nervous about this, but figured what the heck. We’ll try. Later in the day, I had a similar incident of seeing an error of judgement I’d made on a piece of writing that I wasn’t sure was finished to the best of its ability.
I had an Aha moment when I realized the universe had been speaking to me on both occasions, my inner voice telling me, “do the homework the night before,” and “have another look at that piece of writing.” Neither choice spelled permanent disaster. Michael and I made up, and I was given another chance to rework the piece of writing. And miracles of all miracles, I felt the full fear of failure I have in the past when I made big mistakes. I would usually at that point proceed to beat myself up with comments like saying I am useless, etc but then peace filled me. A voice inside told me that yes, I failed, but that I am alive and well and I will grow as a Mom and as a writer from this experience, if I use it correctly and don’t see it as punishment. I’ve come a long way from the scared woman I used to be who feared failure and risk. I also immediately thought to some decisions this week I had made where I had listened to my gut. All of them had worked out beautifully, from the small ones to the big ones. If anything, all this outlined to me how important listening to my inner voice is, and how I must teach Michael to listen to his. Had he listened, he would have not left his homework to the last minute either. 🙂
Exceptional Parents, how often have you not listened to your gut, your intuition and your inner voice? What has it cost you and your child when you have done this? I’m sure the experience was not positive when you didn’t follow that voice. Do yourself a favor. Listen to it, in your personal life, in your job, in your relationships. It won’t lead you wrong, I promise you. It will bring you to a freedom that you never imagined possible, and you will be led down a path where you see the beauty of your life and your child’s. Until next time.