I am so impressed with how Michael is learning how to discuss his difficulties with me. He doesn’t always have the words, but he will say I am not happy, I am angry at you, I am scared. Yesterday morning he was nervous to go to church because his stomach was hurting. He gave me a precursor that it would be a difficult for him at mass, and for the first fifteen minutes it was. He later apologized and we had a good rest of the mass. He is beginning to understand his challenges and when I don’t know how to help him he is patient and trusts me. He also celebrates his victories with me. Like how well he does at the dentist or a doctor’s appointment. He cooperates, does what he’s told and is excited to go. He loves to be out and about with people, as long as there is a predictability to it and one on one he is great. He is learning to adjust to crowds and big events. That is harder. Still, I remind him I am there to help. Last night we talked about his support team at his school, the therapists, the educators and he realized this was a good thing.
“Do other schools have those people Mommy?”
“No, honey. Your school is made to help kids who learn differently.”
“Oh. And they will always help me?”
“Yes, honey. And if things aren’t working, I will sit down with them and all of us will talk about how we can help you learn better. We’re all there to help you.”
He smiled. “And I need to learn so I can get a job, drive a car and sit in traffic.”
He grinned. Michael LOVES sitting in traffic as he gets to watch the other cars and it takes longer to get home. He likes being out, and is still learning how to occupy himself at home. I had to laugh to myself.
“Yes, you need to learn so you can do all those things.”‘
“Ok Mommy. Good night.”
Michael got me thinking about how we all have to deal with hurdles and things that scare us and it’s not always easy. Sometimes it’s downright terrifying. For me it has been tackling my fears of not being able to make a living as a freelance writer, which is something I have wanted to do all my life. I am now becoming more of a risk taker. Thanks to Michael I am learning that I must try, and if I don’t succeed right away, I need to keep believing and trying. I know how good I feel right now that I am not letting fear dictate my life anymore.
How about you Exceptional Moms out there? Is fear running your life or are you facing it down the way you do for your children? It’s only when we confront our own demons that we can truly be free to help others and live our most authentic self. Good luck on your journey. Until next time.