The Necessity of Conventional and Unconventional Tools to Deal with Life’s Stresses-Michael’s Lesson for Me

Having an exceptional child means that life is never boring. And I mean, NEVER. Michael not only has his own way of interacting in the world, but his own language, which he uses with his whole slew of imaginary friends which grows rapidly by the day. 🙂 The language are words he has made up (hmm, maybe there’s a bit of a fiction writer in him after all. 🙂 ) words like “The Has'”and “Greeo.” From what I can understand, “The Has” is a device he inserts so that he is not tempted to hit his head when angry. He removes it when he doesn’t need it anymore. The “Greeo” is a device like a computer hard drive where he inserts disks in order to clean them, I think. It’s all a little much for my non technical brain ladies. Sometimes I’ve been frustrated with these devices or games, when for instance, I am talking to Michael, and he informs me that now he has to insert or take out the  “Has,” and proceeds to do that making all these loud vocal noises. Funny, but when it’s time for dinner, getting ready for school, or bed, I am focused on that task and don’t appreciate the creativity quite the same way as at other times. Also, the Greeo was originally performed on Johnny’s computer, trying to force a CD into a slot and clean it which could potentially damage the machine. Michael would really be curious and we knew he was not deliberately being destructive. The thing is we can’t watch him 24/7 with a house to run, so Johnny gave him an old printer that doesn’t work to perform his “Greeo” game on.

The “Has” is starting to be used less, which is good as the head hitting is going down. I look forward to the day that particular behavior disappears completely, but I digress. My point with all this, is that we are seeing how Michael is using conventional and unconventional tools to deal with stress in his life. Conventional are the massages he asks for, the squeeze toys, the trampoline and swing, and these games or devices are the unconventional. I am so proud of him for venturing into this area that is difficult for most neuro typical children to tread, never mind exceptional children.

Is he really so different from any of us, ladies? We all use tools, some stranger than others, to deal with our stresses. Some are conventional like what I’ve talked about many times in my blog, meditation, exercises, writing, others less so. Singing while cleaning the house and imagining I’m performing on stage somewhere (and yes, I’m doing that now, not as a little kid. Why not? It’s fun, cathartic, and I step outside my comfort zone.) What tools, conventional and unconventional, have you exceptional Moms used out there that have worked for you? In the end, all these tools lead to the same positive result, helping all of us exceptional and neuro typical individuals deal with a rapidly changing world, unpredictability and uncertainty to carve out some sanity, routine and control. Though we will never have complete control over things (and recently I am starting to see how good a thing that is), some degree of control, of mastery over our universe will help us strive for more, to find our place in the world. Think of all the cool things you can do if you let yourself find that balance with what you control, and what you can’t. We exceptional Moms need to find that balance as much as our children do to find out what our mission is. It’s so much more than we think, I promise you. Until next time.

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