Just had another morning of not so patient behavior with Michael. Our weekend was also pretty much like this, shouting,behavior management and me losing it every five seconds. Sound familiar? I think even with neuro typical children they can be ‘off’ at times, but with special needs kids it is a whole other ball game. Sensory issues, sleep issues, gastrointestinal issues, communication issues, need I go on? I didn’t think so. 🙂 Back to my point. This morning both of us slept in. I blame it on part on the very cold winter weather we’re having, but it’s also due I think, to the many changes we’re both going through. Michael has started two afternoons a week at the local after school program up the street from me, I am working part-time at a store (though lately it is quiet on the retail front), and I am in the process of building my writing and speaking business. We have also had lots of extracurricular activities with birthday parties and other functions in addition to the usual adapted activities Michael attends. It’s been a crazy January to say the least! So much so, that with all these changes, more anxieties come to the surface, and with anxieties come behaviors. It doesn’t matter that things are going relatively well. The stress of the unknown is what sets Michael off. And when Michael gets set off, so do I. My patience level lately, on a scale from 1 to 10 is at a -1. Yep, not good. Sometimes I’ve been successful, more often than not this week though, I have failed in this regard. What it showed me though, is what I need to learn about me. And learning is what I am doing. Michael, I have said in the past and will continue to say, is my best teacher. He has taught me many things about life such as 3 ways I can be more of a patient Mom:
1) Be aware of my emotions when the storm hits. I now check in with myself and if I can, ask my husband to step in and manage the storm. If not, I excuse myself and go to a calm corner of my own and regroup then tackle the situation. It’s better for Michael and I.
2) Remind myself not to shout out consequences that are impossible to follow up on. This one is tricky. This morning I yelled out that If he missed the bus I would not drive him into school. In the heat of the moment, I tend to forget logic sometimes. Don’t do this ladies! I laughed about it afterwards, but it wasn’t the best thing to say.
3) Talk to a friend or right down how I could handle something like this better in the future. Like I tell Michael, we all learn from my mistakes. I am living by that now too.
Have a fantastic day ladies, and remember, go easy on yourself. We’re all doing the best we can with what we’ve got. Until next time.