Music and the Family Connection: Michael and I Bonding In the Car

Did you ever have a great moment with your special needs child, one that showed you that they will be ok one day, that they will be able to find their way in the world just fine? I’ve been having lots of them with my son Michael lately, despite the intense anxiety, he is constantly balancing in his brain and fighting to control in his life. His need to be in charge of EVERYTHING, from opening doors, to where we drive, to planning out where we will go or what we will do in the evenings after school, or weekends at home.  And often if things don’t go the way he thinks they should, there are tears, anger and head hitting, as you all know. It is stressful, to be sure, but yet I see his independence coming through and that gives me hope. I also see his sparks of creativity. Do you other Moms out there see a lot of creativity with your kids around music? Among my friends, a few of their sons are tinkering on the piano, love to sing and dance. It seems to transport them, like us, to another world, another dimension where stress is no longer top priority

Tonight, Michael and I were driving home from the local bookstore, after buying one of his friends a birthday present.  Yes, Michael had to pick it out, then give the credit card to the cashier, then tried to sneak in an Olaf stuffed animal with this purchase, but that’s another story. 🙂 Anyway, on the way there and home, we now listen to CDs specifically mine or my husband’s. We have listened to different genres, as our family has eclectic tastes, anything from classical, rock, R &B, to jazz, to pop. Yes, when I say eclectic I mean eclectic. 🙂 I am SO HAPPY that we are through with children’s CDs, specifically Barney songs, which we had to listen to for years on end as you know, our kids like repetition, right Moms? 🙂 Anyway, today he selected some Gospel Music, one of my favorites, a capella recordings by the Montreal Jubilation Choir  I was so happy as it is soothing, and we’ve been having some issues with anxiety at church lately. On top of him enjoying the music and asking with interest “are they singing about God, Mommy?” the music also sparked discussion about his great grandmother Anna, my grandmother who was a very religious woman. Did I mention Michael also loves family history and stories? So, on this particular car ride, his insistence on giving minute by minute directions, inquiring what we would do when we got home, and other anxiety type reactions, was put aside to listen to music with his mother. We had a beautiful conversation about his great grandmother. He even wanted to see a picture of her which I showed him! Now he wants to see more ! I think this is the beginning of something special, and I can’t wait to see where this is going.

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